Naruto x CSI
by Lumpeyeone
Summary: It's been nine years since he beat Sasuke. Nine years since his trial. Nine years since his chakra was sealed and he was banished from Konoha. Eight years ago he changed his name. Five years ago he graduated college. Four years ago he became a CSI. Two years ago his fiance died. Today he's getting arrested.
1. Chapter 1

He sighed as he rose from his bed. He had briefly hoped it wouldn't have come to this but he'd been expecting it since they caught those two Akatsuki members three months ago. It was obvious they would come running when they heard about it. He sighed again as he made his way to the shower.

"It just had to be the two who would recognize me didn't it? I finally had a life away from all that shit when I changed my name and came here." He exits the shower and towels off. "Oh well." He hooks the towel around his waist and wipes the mirror down, revealing his spiky blond haired and blue eyed face staring back at him. He runs a thumb over his whisker marks. "Guess I can't really get rid of these things can I?"

He makes his way back to his bedroom to get dressed as his phone rings. He ignores it as he puts his clothes on, returning to the living room as the answering machine picks up. _"Kazu, where are you? Are you alright? What am I saying? Of course you're all right. Point is those Konoha ninjas came back. They actually brought their Kage with them. She's giving Psy a hell of a time. What the hell is going on Kazu? Do you know something?"_

"You'll know soon enough Jackie Boy." He slides a light black jacket over his grey T-shirt and adjusts the bottom of his faded jeans over his black sneakers. He grabs his keys from the end table near the door and locks said door on his way out of the apartment. He stands for a few seconds before the pocketing the keys and making his way quietly down the stairs of the building. Managing to make it to the garage and get in his faded orange pick up without meeting any of his neighbors he allowed himself a small breather to calm his nerves. He turned the key in the ignition and retrieved his cell phone from the glove box where he 'forgot' it. He slips the phone in his pocket and shifts the truck into gear.

Seven minutes later he pulls into his spot in the employee parking lot and turns the truck off. He can already see the reporters as he makes his way to the front entrance. He brushed them off with a 'no comment' as he ascended the stairs and met the surprisingly sad uniform at the door. He was let inside and made his way towards the elevator as more people sent sad or pitying gazes in his direction.

"Guess it's time to face the music." He muses and presses the button for the fourth floor. Leaning against the back of the elevator he can hear the shouting match above him. "Tsunade's still got some lungs on her." He felt a little nostalgia listening to the voice he hadn't heard in nine years. His little walk down memory lane ending abruptly as the elevator beeps and the doors open. All activity on the floor ended as he steps into the lab and all eyes fall on him.

Two more uniformed officers step up to him with their hands on their holstered pistols. He calmly lets them place the cuffs on as he looks around the lab. He saw Toby, the brown eyed lab tech with brown hair, who finally started working out in the field this year and Kate, the blond haired and red eyed young woman, who replaced him in the lab. He cast his glance over the rest of the techs before his eyes landed on the Konoha ninjas walking towards him with smiles on their faces but he wasn't looking at them. His eyes were locked with his boss Psy as she furrowed her brow at being ignored by the ninjas.

"_I might as well do this now."_ He thought as the officer on his left finished giving his Miranda. "I invoke Article 18, Paragraph 3, Subsection D of the Neos/E.C. border treaty and request my trial and imprisonment be held in my country of arrest." Tsunade looked flabbergasted while Psy smiled at his quick thinking. The Konoha escort of Shikamaru Nara, Tenten, Ino Yamanaka and Sai weren't sure what to make of the scene before them. Ino actually looked offended at his cold tone.

"Naruto I-" Tsunade began but he cut her off.

"My name is Kazu Narumi now. I would appreciate it if you remembered it."

"You're still Naruto Uzumaki to me."

"Naruto Uzumaki died as a ninja of Konoha. I am a Crime Scene Investigator and I'm happier and safer here than I could ever be in your shithole village." He bit back as the officers began leading him away.

"What happened to you Naruto?" Shikimaru hesitantly asked. This Naruto was nothing like he remembered from nine years ago.

"Konoha happened to me Shika." He called back over his shoulder.


	2. Chapter 2

It's been three hours since his arrest. In those three hours he was taken to the local precinct and processed. So now Kazu Narumi, formerly known as Naruto Uzumaki, sits alone in a holding cell as he thinks. The normally unfurnished cell had a steel table in the center with two chairs along the length on either side. The intricate seals on the walls and ceiling completely cut off any ninja from their chakra. Were it not for his past coming to light he probably would've been in a normal cell but Neos doesn't take chances when it comes to ninjas.

"So, how you holding up?" Kazu looked towards the voice. Jackson Boyd aka Jackie Boy walked into the now unlocked cell and handed Kazu a cup of coffee. He answers the unasked question. "Figured you probably left your apartment first thing."

"Thanks." Kazu sips his drink. "You wouldn't happen to have any bacon or eggs in that bag, would you?" Jackie smirks.

"Nah, just some donuts. You know good food." He sets the white bag on the table. Kazu studied his longtime friend. The red haired, green eyed man seemed to always have a smile on hand yet still managed to be intimidating in his detective suit.

"What's the news?"

"Your hearing's on Friday. What are you going to do?"

"That depends on who the judge is." Kazu lifts an eyebrow. "Who is the judge anyway?"

"Roberts."

"Then there's nothing I can do. He'll have his verdict chosen before we even get to court."

"I wouldn't be too sure about that. You apparently saved his Goddaughter's life during one of your cases."

"So I have one thing going for me. That doesn't really help much when there isn't a single lawyer out there who's willing to risk their necks on a ninja jurisdiction case."

"And again you are mistaken. Dolly Molly decided to step in as your legal counsel."

"Dolly Molly? The stripper from Banditos?"

"The very same. Turns out that paying for law school line was on the up. She graduated at the top of her class five months ago."

"Wow, a stripper that actually paid for education. Now I've heard everything."

"That's where the good news ends though." Jackie leans back in his chair. "They got this guy named Tenzo going over your files and I mean ALL your files trying to find something, I just don't know what. Your official charges have finally been released too. Those Konoha guys are slapping you with two counts of High Treason, sixteen counts of first degree murder, one count of attempted murder, three counts of rape, one count of theft from the account of one Minato Namikaze, one count of theft from the account of one Kushina Uzumaki, and one count of theft of the family heirloom of the Senju clan. The weirdest part isn't even the charges themselves."

"Let me guess, they're willing to drop everything but the treason and murder charges in exchange for a sperm sample." Jackie bites back a sigh at Kazu's correct assumption.

"You know, one of these days I'm going to find out how you and Toole do that."

"We await your challenge with the greatest of enthusiasm." Kazu lifts his coffee like a wine glass. "I'll admit I'm surprised about the rape charges." Jackie gives him a weird look.

"What the hell's that supposed to mean?"

"They're the only ones without any merit."

"You actually killed 16 people?"

"Not personally but I'm pretty sure I'm the reason they're dead."

"And why is that?"

"I ran through a bandit camp to get away from ROOT ninjas that wanted to drag me to their master. I'm almost certain they took it out on the camp when they realized I escaped."

"And the thefts?"

"I can't steal what someone left me in their wills or lost in a bet."

"Got any proof of that?"

"I've got the wills in a safety deposit box."

"Hope for the best." Jackie starts with a smile.

"Prepare for the worst." Kazu finishes.

"One last thing." Jackie stands up and starts fishing into his coat. "Due to your 'years of dedicated service' you get a phone call." He sets a red cell phone on the table.

"You're not only giving me a phone call, you're letting me use my own phone to do it?" Kazu's smile doesn't reach his eyes. "Too bad I have no one to call."

"Yes you do." Jackie says forcefully, sliding the phone closer. "They deserve to know what's going on."

"It's better if they don't get involved." Depression settled over Kazu's features.

"You think they won't be? News Flash! Vicky's running the story at noon. It's better if you tell them then letting them see you in cuffs on TV!" Kazu flinched at his friends tone.

"I wouldn't even know what to say."

"Now you're just making excuses. Pick up the phone, dial the damn number, and talk to them. I'll be back in a bit." Jackie stands up from his chair and walks to the door, giving Kazu one last look before leaving the room.

Kazu just stares at the red device on the table as if wishing it to vanish. Seeing that it wasn't going anywhere, he hesitantly reached out and picked it up. He flipped it open and then closed it, open, close, open, close, open, close, open, he stared at the background image. He remembered that day perfectly.

**(FLASHBACK)**

A seventeen year old Kazu sat on a university bench, brow scrunched in frustration.

"How the hell do you use this damn thing?" His eyes kept shifting between his new phone and the instruction booklet.

"Phone troubles?" The sudden voice of his girlfriend made Kazu scream and fall off the bench. He glared at her laughing form as he stood.

"Oh that's very funny Julie."

"I though it was." She says still giggling a little. "So what's the problem?"

"I'm trying to change the background on my phone."

"Give it here." She stretches out her palm.

"I can do it myself." He huffs.

"Sure you can." She reaches for the phone. "Just let me see it."

"No." He pulls the phone away.

"So you're going to be like that? Just so happens Mum taught me exactly what to do in situations like this."

"Oh really? What's tha…" He's cut off when she draws him into a deep, passionate kiss causing his mind to shut down. She snatches the phone and moves away from him just as he regains his bearings. "Hey, give it back." He reaches towards her.

"Nope." She replies as she twirls around him while expertly setting up the phone's camera with one hand. She dodges around him again as he gets close and jumps onto his back, hooking one arm around his neck and thrusting the one with the phone forward. "Say Cheese!"

"What." He looks ahead to catch the flash of his camera's phone. "My eyes!"

"Sorry." The mirth in her voice said otherwise. When his vision finally clears he finds the phone directly in front of him, the picture she had just taken set as its background. He dumbly accepts the phone and looks to her smiling face. "Now you have a background." She puts on an angry pout. "And you better not change it for anything mister or there'll be hell to pay."

"Yes mam!"

**(End Flashback)**

He didn't change it either. Not for the six years he's had it and he wouldn't change it for anything. Kazu closed the phone again and set it back on the table. His head hung low and his shoulders shaking as his tears cascaded down.


End file.
